The Islonia Tourist Board Welcomes You!

Since the time of Erik Bloodaxe and Gudrun Stronginthearm the fair land of Islonia has been the subject of misty reverie in Viking saga and Gaelic folk song alike. Tales of lost love, mer-maidens, hidden treasure and fierce warriors abound within the history of this mystical Isle.

Settled by Viking warriors in deep dark ages past, whose bones and boats slumber ‘neath the soil, Islonia’s ancient stones stand testament to those first peoples who once dwelled along her shores and within her leafy glades. The ancient epic “O’ Islun Maid, thou art fay’re” is reproduced in full. Also you can read the folk song “Ach a wee bonny bairn” in translation from the early Pictish dialects of Islonia.

Ancestral home of the current King Ian and Queen Jess and their royal wains, the beautiful island nation of Islonia stands fast in the encircling waters of the mighty Atlantic, boldly asserting her independence to mankind and mother nature alike.

In the run up to the 2010 Elections, it was decided after looking at the various parties on offer, that the only sensible vote was for independence.

-King Ian


Economy and Trade

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Islonia’s economy is underpinned by its great harbour which makes the island a focus of regional trade, and its wealth of natural piscatorial resources…

Politics and World Affairs

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Islonia is an absolute Monarchy with all decisions taken by King Ian based on careful consideration and what might be on Sky TV in the evening…

Customs and Traditions

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The people of Islonia are generous, easy going, happy, talkative and sociable. This may explain why so few have held down full time jobs or ever been on time…