Hot Tub on Islonia Brings Renewed Interest In Bathtime


Winter is normally a dire season for locals, as residents of the Old Curring Station find it increasingly difficult to part with their warm fleecy robes and favorite footie pajamas in exchange for a bath. “After all, this house was originally built to be a natural refrigerator,” says Princess Isla. But all that Winter time build up of body odor may soon end with the recent introduction of American made Hot Tubs to the Kingdom of Islonia. “The locals couldn’t be more thrilled,” says King Ian. Three year old Prince Finlay has ceased all interest in his once favorite toy digger, and can now be found sipping virgin Mai Tais and talking about how challenging his day was whilst sitting in front of his favorite bubble jet.

The economic effects of the new baths are still yet to be seen. Economists on the island fear that costs for procuring electricity from neighboring nations could skyrocket. King Ian assures his subjects that an increase in tourism as a result of the Hot Tubs will more than return the costs incurred. Queen Jess indicates that the Hot Tubs are useful for much more than just bathing, but so far draws a line at shellfish saying, “all lobsters will still be cooked in the kitchen.”

Islonia Embassy Begins Construction in Border Village

The department of immigration and border control has begun construction of a new embassy in the border village of Badachro. Local Islonians are excited about growth this will add to the local economy, bringing in a 200% increase in employment and GDP. Applications for work at the new embassy are pouring in as the royal family takes into careful consideration the future of the new office abroad.